Yes being myself is where I am now.

Experimenting

First started back when I was 14 with a friend at school. He loved getting undressed in front of me in my bedroom which kind of got me quite excited. Then he got me to undress too, so there we were both naked looking at each other. His cock was so much bigger than mine and he asked me if I liked to suck it. So as he laid on my bed I held his cock and it hardened in my hand. Putting it in my mouth I sucked it slowly trying not to catch his girth with my teeth I tried to get it all in and stopped short of gagging. He sucked my cock with was a really good feeling.

I was a little embarrassed that my cock was somewhat smaller than his but he comforted me saying that does not matter.

“There is nothing more feminine than a blowjob. You naked on your knees. Your guy with his hand resting on the back of your head. A really good blowjob confirms some primal nostalgia. It puts the world in balance.”

― Chloe Thurlow, The Secret Life of Girls

Bodily fluid

So now it’s time to get close, we would just rub our bodies and cocks together feeling someone close was such an awesome feeling for me being only 14 and maybe I should of being doing this with some girl from class but no I was doing it with my mate and I didn’t care.

I have masturbated in front of him and he watched my cum intently and he told me that he never managed to cum. He told me a story that him and his mum when to the doctors and the doctor was “rubbing my cock” as he put it but nothing would come out. So both of us lying once again naked on my bed we got close and was kissing, his lips all over mine I could feel that this was going somewhere we yet haven’t been.

I told him to move on top of me, me of course taking the submissive role! Well yes his cock was enormous compared to mine. I would of lifted my legs and let him put his cock up my ass but he didn’t want that he just wanted to rub his cock over my cock and balls. He enjoyed that I could see it in his face so I told him to make longer hard thrusts, now where did that come from? my dirty mind of course and I wanted to see more of him. He was thrusting hard when he wanted to stop as he said he was gonna pee but I said no your not and carry on. He moaned so fucking loud and lifted up and his cock just fucking exploded loads of an orange goo mixed with cum shot out of him and covered my chest and belly a cumshot I would be honoured to receive now. He quickly got some toilet paper for me so I could start to clean myself of his mess before it gets on my bed sheets. He said that’s why the doctor was rubbing his cock he was trying to make him cum. I said maybe but we’ve done it together then a quick snog before we got dressed.

“The best way to get over one man is to go down on another.”
― Chloe Thurlow, The Secret Life of Girls

We unfortunately never did anything anything like that again him saying that “it was just schoolboys experimenting”. Secretly I was gutted I mean this was a start of a schoolboy crush as I was just starting to get into it and wanted to take it to the next level but it was what it was and we remained good friends. None of our other mates knew about what we got up to. What happened in the bedroom stayed in the bedroom.

Many years later.

So many years have now passed and have been married and divorced, had some same sex experiences but nothing to shout about really. Then one day in my flat I start thinking about female underwear so I plucked up some courage and when to the shops. Browsing the lingerie section of Debenhams feeling that everyone is watching me then I come across tights and stockings. I didn’t want tights I want something really sexy so had to be stockings but I didn’t have a suspender belt so went for hold ups. So I purchased a pair of black and white hold ups and took them back to my flat. I shaved my legs and put them on, yes I felt at one with them on so I went online and ordered basically a full underwear drawer followed by a wig and a pair of high heel stilettoes.

Dating apps are great for quick meets and now I had an extensive wardrobe and make up I can begin my journey on being me.

Big one.

Since my first experience I have always wanted well hung guys and so I found a guy who had the equipment. So I left home dressed and ready. A 50 minute drive to his place and I parked up and walked to his flat wearing a short summer polka dot dress, crotch-less tights and black ankle boots. I felt free and fucking amazing. The door was open for me and I walked up some stairs and met him, he maid me comfortable and after we had a cup of tea. He asked if he could take some pictures and video providing me a mask. Then he stood up and pulled down his trousers. Fuck Me it was huge I mean fucking massive no way is that going to get in my mouth. I started kissing his long shaft whilst my hand cupped his smooth balls then I opened my mouth and sucked the head of his cock before putting more of it in my mouth back and forth, my tongue lapping around it’s head. I opened wider and took him deep down my throat as his balls rested on my chin and I managed to keep it stuck there for about 10 seconds before I started to gag so I pulled it out and a big gloopy spit was reaching from it and my mouth. Wow I thought I’m loving this so when for more feeling I was in a porno movie. Then he moved me on to his sofa with my ass stuck out high, he put some gel up my ass then his cock was at my back entrance. He put both his hands on my hips and pressed his cock firmly inside my ass, the pain I remember was so intense it took the wind out of me. I was beginning to think that this was a mistake and I wasn’t ready to take such a big cock but as he thrusted deep into me I felt well fucking awesome then the rhythm got quicker and he was fucking me now. I was moaning with each deep thrust and after a minute I asked for more “fuck me, fuck me harder” and he obliged fucking me so fucking hard I felt that my head was going to go through the wall. My legs was shaking I was having my first anal orgasm and it was fucking great I mean I was loving being roughly fucked hard and I felt like a sissy whore. This what I wanted big cocks fucking me so so hard.

He took it out and I was sucking hard and fast like no tomorrow I felt is cock throb and my mouth filling with his hot cum, lovely tasting mouthful of spunk which I swallowed. It tasted so good and was thick and creamy and I was a very happy girl and I walked back to the car I felt at one with myself. I mean I found a guy, sucked his big cock, let him fuck me and eat his cum, Job Done!